This is me not freaking out

My last Ironman training experience was full of fear.  In my heart, I knew I could do it.  But I was motived by the thought of how much it would hurt or (worse) not finishing.  I went into workouts, most of which were personal-bests for me wondering which workout would kill me.  And then being pleasantly suprised when a solo-100 mile bike ride was fine and even a bit fun.  The whole experience was new and unknown.  I would frequently catch myself thinking about it and my pulse would race and I started to breathe a bit harder.  It was scary but also fun.

I'm now training for my second Ironman.  I've selected one that is significantly harder than my first.  Ok, maybe not significantly, but the bike is WAY harder.  But I'm not scared.  Maybe I know that my coach will train me up properly and I will finish.  I'm ok with not making time gains, mainly because the bike is 4,000 ft more climbing this time.  But I know I can do it.  Because I have before.

This makes a huge difference mentally.

It has been well documented that I am not a strong cyclist on the hills.  I am hoping that this will change.  I have also signed up for IM St George 70.3.  A course which is nortorious for how hard it is.  And somehow I've signed up for this as a training race for IMCDA.

I am crazy.

The bike is definitely a stretch.  It has a 4 mile long Cat 2 climb.  I know what a Cat 1 climb feels like.  I can probably walk faster than I can ride a Cat 1 climb.  I had a freaking spider create a web on my handlebars on that damn hill.  But I made it (with a bunch of walking) and I lived.  It was bad but not awful.  And that Cat 1 was with minimal training.  I am confident hopeful that with the right training, going up that 10% grade in St George will be fine.  Hard, but fine.

Training this time around is definitely different.  I feel pretty strong and like I'm on the right track.  I know what to expect.  Sure, all of this hill training may hurt a LOT, but I know that it will make me stronger.  Which really, is about all anyone can hope for.