Thursday, July 03, 2014

Peak Week Crabbiness

I am ridiculously crabby and I need to get over it.  I signed up for this race and to do well, I need to just put my head down and get to work.

What I didn't think about when I signed up for IMBoulder is that I effectively killed my summer.  There's not much free time for fun when your race is Aug 3rd.  And really, its the missing out on stuff that's making me crabby.  Instead, I should be focusing on the experiences and fun I am having while training in Colorado in the summer.  As far as training places go, CO is hard to beat.
The view during my 12 mi run last weekend.  
Instead of focusing on how strong I'm getting and how pretty my training rides/runs/swims are, I'm focusing on what I'm missing out on.

Case in point: this weekend. The 4th of July.  A holiday weekend with bbqs and camping and fun.  And what will I be doing?  s/b/r'ing, sleeping, eating, and spending time on the couch with my feet up.

Really, I would have mentally been ok if it weren't for a random invitation to a BBQ on Friday from 11-2. There's really no way I can go, because I'll be s/b/r'ing for nearly 6 hours.  And who has a bbq party that ends at 2?  In all honestly, this is just IM peak week fatigue getting to me.  The invite was from a HS friend who lives in town but I never see. I can't say I've been invited to his house for a party ever.  I may have invited him, not sure, but he's never been over our way.  Essentially, he's not a close friend, but I am tweaked that I can't go to his BBQ.  I think its more the fact that I can't do something holiday-ish because I have 6 hours of s/b/r.  If it was any other Friday, I wouldn't even be complaining.

Then to add insult, I might not even get to stay up late enough to enjoy fireworks.  I have a 1:15 swim and a 2:30 run.  I was going to run first and then swim, which meant that I needed to start running at 5:45 AM (and leave my house at 5:15).  Yep, no fireworks with that alarm time.  My coach informed me that I need to swim first and then run, and the pond doesn't open until 7:30, so I won't need to leave my house until 6:45. Which makes firework viewing more likely.  But then I'm cranky that I have to run for 2:30 in the heat.

I was talking to my best friend yesterday, trying to arrange weekend plans for July 19th.  She's coming here and doing a memorial service for her deceased husband in the mountains.  This is not ideal timing for me (time or money) to spend a weekend in the mountains.  But she's my sister, I'm Auntie E to her kids, and my ass needs to be up there for support.  But the logistics are stressing me out.  I've got Saturday morning blocked out for her, but I need to be s/b/r'ing the rest of the time.  Not to mention getting sleep and eating properly.  The poor thing caught me yesterday afternoon when I was coming home from work and just got a very unhappy version of me.  I recognized that, took a nap, and and my mood was better.  Sorta.  She at least saw my panic and booked me my own room at the lodge instead of asking me to share a room with a stranger in a house full of kids, so I'd have my space and some quiet for sleep.  The food concerns me a bit (I will be in a hotel room for 4 days but can walk over to their cabin to cook).  And the logistics will be interesting.  Not to mention the pressure of spending time with people at a time when I'm at my most selfish and I quite literally don't have very much of me to give.  Just just just, but but but.... ugh.

I just need to survive the next ~3+ weeks and get to taper.

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